When do you know?
Oh the places you will go - what are you waiting for?
This weekend of May 6, 2023 will mark the 140th Commencement for The University of Texas at Austin, my alma mater. I am a proud member of the Class of 1998, and I even had the greatest honor of being the McCombs Commencement speaker back in 2013. I’m forever a grateful Longhorn - what starts here truly changes the world. #HookEm
I recently happened to be hanging out with some professionals that are at least a decade younger than me, some even just newly minted professionals (max 2 years out of college), and there was a common thread of curiosity. The question of “when do you know?” kept coming up.
When do you know that you’ve found the right career?
When do you know you’ve found the right partner in life?
When do you know it’s a good time to change careers?
When do you know to leave a safe job?
The list goes on….
And here’s my short answer - you never will know UNTIL AFTER you actually go through the fire/the walk/taking the big risk/etc.
I had to recently re-read the book Behind the Red Velvet Curtain I wrote back in early 2017 about how I started RED VELVET with only $8K cash and with zero former hospitality/events experience and again many people asked HOW, though, were you not scared to take such a big risk?
The honest answer is I didn’t let the fear hold me back because I told myself if I DON’T do this now, how am I ever going to know if this worked? And, will I have more regrets of not trying to make a change for myself if I don’t give myself every opportunity to pursue a career I am naturally passionate about? And that’s the truth of it…you have to do hard things to test your limits and to truly discover what you’re meant to do. Oftentimes people will let fear hold them back from being their best self or they will allow excuses to stop them from trying. I didn’t do this - I charged full steam ahead.
Maybe your next step is a smaller step than starting your own business. But do not stop reaching, even if it’s just a little bit at a time. Don’t be afraid to be uncomfortable. Each time you try, you learn and you’ll be one step closer to your dream.
If you are graduating from a college/university this May, first, CONGRATULATIONS as you’ve already accomplished something that only 35-40% of our population has done (thanks Google for this statistic). This is HUGE! Be proud. Naturally the next questions are what’s next - more school, job, travel, other? And this is where you can test your appetite for risk and ask yourself have I figured out what am I naturally good at and can I be that best person in my next phase of life using my natural strengths?
Referencing back to my book, when I first wrote it, I did it because many people repeatedly asked me the same 7-10 questions about how I started the business. This was my way of sharing with the world those answers and hopefully regaining control of my schedule again as I did a lot of meetings with individuals since I promised that if I ever was successful with this second career, I would give back (and I’m still sticking to that promise). Along the journey, though, I discovered that some people use my book to help motivate them to lean into what they are naturally passionate and eager to learn more about to either start their own business OR to start a new career working for someone. And some use the book to reassure them that it’s ok to try new (and hard) things even though your gut is telling you you’re afraid to make the leap.
My biggest piece of advice now looking back on 20 years in this business is: take stock of your strengths and lean into them NOW. And, with that knowledge in hand, consider that the one thing you might be the most afraid to try or do is actually your gut telling you it’s the thing you MUST do. Regardless of all the ways fear can present itself. Trust your gut. And, as you enter your next chapter, ask yourself: are you doing everything you can to lean into your strengths and just make it - whatever “it” is - happen? If you are, you’ll know when.